Hopeful Thinking

Who are we, really? As a species, I mean? What is genuinely natural to us? And what is learned? And what about us decides whether or not what we’ve learned is something we should apply?  While not all in the world are Christian, obviously, Christianity has a way of speaking quite loudly at this time of year. Especially in the west. Aided by the vast amounts of commercialism applicable to the celebration of the season, Christmas has taken on a level of prominence in our society that far exceeds its religious expression or its religious community. Everyone, it seems, is subject to the exposure of ideas about Christmas, like it or not.  Some limit their holiday time to general ideas about goodness, Santa Claus, gift-giving, mirth, and recognitions of the return of the light as the days begin to get longer. And that has great value. But there is a story in Christmas; even a story behind the story.  The man we now refer to as Jesus was not born 2,019 years ago last...

What does the word grace mean to you? It might conjure thoughts of something graceful, like a ballet dancer. Or it might be the prayer ritual of giving thanks before a meal. Perhaps it could be that your first thought about grace is a specifically religious one. In some faith systems, grace refers only to the receipt of eternal salvation granted solely by God upon a person’s declaration of a specific belief. Say you believe and free grace is yours. But this definition strays from the word’s origins and ignores the power we each of us has to bestow it ourselves. There is more, however, to the word grace. But in all cases, including those mentioned above, grace is joyful, happy, free and pleasurable. The Latin origin is gratus, meaning pleasing, thankful and it is conceptually related to kindness. When something is given to us for free it is sometimes referred to as being gratis, or free of charge. Gratis in Latin means ‘as a kindness.’ None of those word origins speak direct...

Patience is an interesting practice. Of course, it takes practice. But it also takes patience with oneself while practicing it. The irony is evident. But patience is, in reality, a practice of nonresistance and forgiveness, even hospitality. Because, when we think about who and what frustrates us, we have to acknowledge it’s typically because, right or wrong, our expectations are not being met. The practice being recommended here is not so much about altering our expectations, as reframing them. Long before I met him, my husband Jamie used to suffer from low-grade road rage. He wouldn’t get out of the car and punch someone’s windshield, but he’d scream and yell (and likely gesticulate colorfully through the window) whenever someone would demonstrate less-than-stellar driver courtesy. A thought was suggested to him that when these moments occur he think of himself in the guise of the old Imperial margarine campaign, trumpet fanfare calling as a crown magically appears on his...

Albert Einstein concluded that time is relative. It’s easy to say but difficult to quite fully take in the implications of the idea. It means a few different things. Specific to Einstein‘s theory, it states that if you were to take a clock and bring it to different places on the planet, or the solar system, galaxy, or universe, it would move at a different speed relative to your present location. To you, it would appear the same in either place because time will be moving for you at the same speed as the clock itself. But if you could compare your clock with one in a different place within the universe, they would be moving at such different speeds as to be impossible to compare. Another instance of time relativity is in the recognition that gravity also makes an impact on the speed of time. A clock at sea level, where gravity is slightly stronger than at higher altitudes, will move a fraction of millisecond faster than a clock on top of Mount Everest where gravity is slightly we...

It’s all about feeling good, really. Joy. Undiluted, full-strength, lo-and-behold, rapture. That’s what we are meant to know and experience. It is a sacred right to be happy. But what do we do about that right? We first have to accept it as a right. Allow me to repeat it, then: You have a sacred right to be happy. So often we are taught by society to place our own desires and happiness in second place as compared to the needs of our loved ones, of the community, and of, well, the whole world, frankly. Everyone else comes first. How’s that going for you? Before we get into how to be happier, let’s address why. Enhanced happiness not only improves the quality of your life, it improves the quality of the lives of all those around you. At the very least, it does no additional damage. Happiness is contagious and few are immune to it. Plus, happiness is physically healthier. A preponderance of scientific evidence has clearly illustrated the beneficial effects of serotonin and ...

What does it take to be honest? I mean genuine, 100 percent, truth-telling honesty as a daily life practice. Do we recognize how often we are even slightly dishonest? One study found that 60 percent of people lied at least once during a 10-minute conversation and told an average of two to three lies. Women were more likely to lie in order to make someone else feel good, while men lied to make themselves look good. That gender disparity aside, for there is far too much to unpack here in that alone, let’s consider what it would take to be completely honest for that 10-minute conversation. The short answer is: practice. Primarily, self-awareness is the key. We need lots of practice to be self-aware about what we say and why we say it. In scripture it is said that it’s not what goes into someone’s mouth which defiles them, it’s what comes out of it. How often do we think we are doing the “right thing” by fibbing or bending the truth, even in the interest of sparing someone’s fee...

It occurred to me, while watching a documentary about advanced mathematics recently, that there is a difference between something that has been created and something which has been revealed. Mathematicians think of mathematics as something which has always existed and is “discovered” over time rather than something which humanity has invented from scratch on its own. By what is that discovery encouraged? Some world scripture is defined as having been “revealed”—by God, ostensibly—rather than written. This takes the authorship of the text out of human hands, which are considered transcribers rather than authors. In other words, a person may be putting pen to paper, but they claim the words are not theirs. In modern spiritual terminology this would be referred to as channeling. Although some may take exception to the term, channeling is, by definition, what’s occurring when a person is claiming that they are transcribing ideas which do not come from them, but from something othe...

Navigating life is a pain in the butt, frankly. It’s an unending series of rights and lefts. Constantly trying to figure out where to place your foot next so that you don’t step in anything revolting, then track it in the house and ruin the carpet. We often mean well but make mistakes anyway. We often hurt people to whom we are attempting to show our love. And worst of all we sometimes break things our intention was to repair. Of course practicing forgiveness is the first good idea. Both for ourselves and others. It’s important to model forgiving behavior for those from whom we will likely be asking for it one day. Don’t just pay it forward, pay it in advance.  In the meantime, it’s best to practice finesse. The definition of the word finesse is a bit opaque. One definition I found states that it’s an “intricate and refined delicacy.” Not so clear. The word origins also add the word purity, however. And that’s a pretty good place to start. Purity is a word that revolves...

When I switch back and forth on my television from cable to another media device I have to press a button on the remote control which says “source.“ It switches the view of what I’m watching on the screen from the signal coming from the cable box, for instance, to a signal from the DVD player. But if the DVD player isn’t turned on when I switch it, the screen will display nothing but the words, “No Signal.“ Meaning, I’m in the right place, but there’s nothing to see here.  Sometimes my brain is so busy that I can hardly get a word in edgewise. Things I’m worried about, things I’m happy about, things I know I have to get to, and things I’m glad I’m finished. It’s like watching a news cycle on six different media outlets all at the same time.  Nearly every time I see the words “No Signal“ on the television screen I take a deep breath and say, “Thank you.” Sometimes I can then go several seconds without letting anything enter my mind. Eventually, it all creeps back, o...

I had a conversation with a good friend recently. He’s not a religious person, by any stretch. He has been to my church a couple of times and has expressed an interest in the way I approach things. But that’s about as close to organized religion as he’s ever been comfortable with. I have no issue with this, of course. It’s not my job to convert people to any particular religion. I prefer to help people assess what religion they already are. Because I truly believe everybody has a religion. Of one fashion or another. Sometimes it’s hard to recognize what religion we profess. And by use of the word ‘religion’ here, I mean to say that we all place our faith in something. It’s good to have an idea of what it is. But most of us subscribe to faith systems which we don’t even realize are in progress. We may go to church, we may profess a certain type of faith regarding the nature of God, or lack of It. But the philosophies and principles of those religions may not be what you, deep d...