Hopeful Thinking - Monday, October 9, 2017 - Be the Hand

I missed my deadline this past week. I procrastinated. Lost track of the days. I know exactly why. I was uncomfortable with what I knew I had to write about: facing tragedy.

There’s been so much of it lately. And it seems to be piled on top of already too much upheaval, too much world sorrow. What is there to say that doesn’t sound contrite, or worse, condescending? What advice is there to give? No heart has ever heeded the command to heal. It does it on its own time, if even then. As an optimist I know all too well; “Look on the bright side!” has its limitations.

I ask myself, what is my own consolation in these times? What settles my soul when the even the planet itself appears to be angry with humanity? It’s easy to imagine the development of ancient mythological storylines where furious gods demand our undivided attention. We feel punished. Where goes the optimist then?

In the Book of Jōb, when Jōb is at his lowest—his wealth, his family, his health, all gone—the first thing his friends do is just sit with him. They rip their clothes and put ashes on their heads and join him in his grief. They don't try to solve it. They don't yet try to explain it. They just sit with him for seven days in silence.

As tragedy continues to scour the earth we might find more comfort in just being the hand that holds. We cannot prevent natural disasters. We seem to be powerless against mass shootings. Even if we stopped using fossil fuels this exact moment the planet will still have stormy feelings to express about it for generations to come. What else is there to do sometimes but simply go and be with the grieving?

Of course we must continue to participate in the political processes that will help accomplish smarter gun use, better environmental protections, stronger building codes, improved mental health care. But those feel like sisyphean tasks when we are still in the thick of our grief. Our responses are not measured, we react when we should respond. Social changes such as the ones we truly need take generations.

In the meantime be the hand that holds. We know so little about the Ultimate Reality or Its purposes. Spend less time arguing with God and more time consoling one another. That is the best way to insure our survival through these most challenging times. We are not powerless! We are amazing, loving, creative and powerful beings capable of accomplishing so much when we do it together.

Act in favor of the long game, but remember that your greatest value is to those wounded hearts among us right now. If you feel helpless, hug someone who needs it. If you feel powerless, the advice is no different. You don't have to know all, or any, of the answers. You just have to show up.