So, now I come to the point in my new life that I have to figure out a way to synthesize it with my old one. How do I combine my careers with my theological path? In one major sense, they are not disparate ideas at all; my dual-careers (my community and my music) have always been informed by my evolving theology. It is why I partnered my two careers together in the first place. My faith system encourages me to do well by doing good, the central tenet of cause marketing and social enterprise (thank you, David Roth and Corinne Farinelli for teaching this to me). It is perfectly natural to me to believe that greater profit comes from high-integrity business plans. Plans which create opportunities to collaborate with the community. When everyone is a shareholder, everyone participates. When everyone participates, a network is automatically generated within the group. When a network exists, all things are possible.
But in the specifics, I have the Tribe: my band and funky family. And I have the next three years of divinity school. And I make stained glass. And I like to write. I like to plan big events. And I'm remodeling my house. How do these things now synthesize into one being that can pay his cable bill every month?
I have a feeling the answer already exists in the ether. The solution is out there and probably already in the works. The person who has the right thing to contribute or say which generates in me the idea, perhaps. Or maybe I'll just stumble upon it and be doing it before I even realize I'm doing it; perhaps find that I've been doing it all along just with one little element missing.
I feel that I should be more concerned about my finances, but I just can't seem to bring myself to be able to worry about it. I somehow feel very well supported even though I can't see it. I am consciously letting it buoy me. I have no answers. But I don't let that fact disturb me. I am surfing the present, because I don't know what the future holds. I will not be driftwood.
The waves of life are both beautiful and terrible. They can kill us, and they can bring us to higher grounds. They are as Judas: part of a terrible plan meant to save us all. A double-edged sword.
I will be a surfer of these waves. Or at least I aspire to be. I will not be driftwood. I will let the wave beneath my board speak to me and intuitively tell me which direction to point myself. I will stay in the sweet spot until the very moment I gently walk off the tip as it glides to rest in the wet sand. And then my answer will be waiting for me.
Whatever answer I seek to whatever question I may have is waiting for me at the shoreline. I have only to get there. And there are many ways for a plank of wood to reach the shore. Few of them are pleasant. Few of them are fast. But one way is to be a surfboard. It requires no power other than your intellect and your body. The waves are always there, ready to smash us against the rocks or to power us forward. It's up to me which one I choose.
So, the answer to my question is: Accept the fact that I don't yet know the answer, but accept that the answer exists. If I acknowledge its presence, it will manifest more quickly, no? I would think even in the literal sense, if you make a decision to see a rose, you'll come across one because you're now on the lookout. Likewise, if I assume that there's a way to combine my fields of study and practice in a way that inspires integrity and profit - both social as well as financial - a way will appear. It's a tall order, I admit. But with God all things are possible, they say. And if God is in me then I have some of that magic wand too.
And so do you.
What are you going to point your magic wand at today? When you know the answer, that will be the moment when the rubber hits the road, when the surfboard itself knows what to do, and when your heart is at peace atop the most tempestuous sea. Wish me luck with my wave and I'll send you some good mojo for yours!
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